Where have I been??

I know you must wonder where in the world I've been hiding, since there've been no updates in over a week. Actually, I'm blogging from my own dining room right now. Last weekend some long-time friends of our family, Ron & Kristina (Dick's friends and ours), came to Dick's for the weekend. Ron is like a son to Dick & Nancy, and we have all fallen in love with his darling wife, Kristina, and their extremely bright and adorable 3-year old son, A.J., who is crazy about his Grandpa Dick and Grandma Nancy.



Ron & Kristina arrived last Thursday afternoon, so I was preoccupied visiting with them through the weekend. On Saturday evening I decided on a whim to ask if I could ride home with them to spend a few days with my poor lonely hubby. Actually, my husband almost begged me to come home, and I couldn't resist, although I have felt extremely guilty about leaving my sis & mom behind. I am flying back to California this coming Sunday at noon, and my sweet sister and Mom are driving all the way in to Sacramento airport to fetch me. The time at home has been a wonderful break (has gone by so quickly), but while at home I have that nagging yucky little anxious feeling in my tummy. When I'm home, I miss being there with Dick and everyone, and when I'm there, I desperately miss my husband, who has been so unbelievably sweet and supportive. Sometimes it feels somewhat like a no-win situation, but I want to be with my brother. We don't know how much time we have with him.



I may have already mentioned this - Dick had several really difficult days after his October 10 chemo infusion. He was so exhausted, and in general felt just plain lousy. Then that Wednesday afternoon he came to his bedroom door after taking a nap and said, "Hey, watch this!" and proceeded to walk across the living room almost completely normally - no limp, no foot-dragging gait. His speech seemed better, too, although it was still a struggle. He said he felt a lot better, and even tried to use his right hand a little. The improvement only lasted a few days, but we were encouraged that the Avastin may have shrunk the tumor some.



The week that Ron & Kristina came Dick was still feeling pretty decent, and had another Avastin infusion on Friday, the 24th. On the Thursday prior to that, we went next door to visit the chickens. Dick was watching them peck and scratch, and he said, "I want chickens... next spring..." He couldn't finish, and he began to cry. He wants to be around next spring to raise some chickens of his own, but fears he'll be gone by then. I just held him and he, my sis and I all three cried. It's so heartbreaking - we can't offer him any assurance that he'll still be with us next spring. But, you know what - none of us knows whether we'll be here next spring. We only have today, this moment - nothing more. No one does! But it is so frightening to have a disease that threatens any longevity we might have as humans living on this old earth. I can only imagine the things that must run through Dick's mind when he's alone with his thoughts. It's sobering to contemplate!



On Friday, Ron spent the day doing some tasks around the house for Dick & Nancy. He built a section of the back yard fence that had been left unfinished. He fashioned and installed some wonderful brackets for the front porch wrought-iron railings to make them sturdy as new (no more wobbling!), installed the new microwave over the kitchen stove, and put beautiful new handles on two of the three glass sliding doors that exit from the back of the house.



We ladies were not even the tiniest bit disturbed by all of Ron's pounding and grinding. We just rested, hung out and chatted a mile a minute while we watched A.J. play on the carpet with his toys (what a sweet, smart boy he is!). On Friday afternoon my sis & I took A.J. on a long enjoyable walk where we searched for giant acorns and pine cones. Then on Saturday we all took a walk to feed some slightly-wrinkled apples to the horses who live just around the corner. Nancy brought Dick in the car, and he helped feed apples to the horses - very enjoyable.



On Sunday morning I had set my alarm for 5 a.m. Now, you need to know something. This is a brand new little atomic clock, and I've never tried using the alarm function. Of course, I had everything totally ready on Saturday night so I wouldn't disturb anyone else in the house as I dressed and got ready to leave. Unfortunately, when I got up Sunday morning I thought for sure I had turned off the alarm, but had merely "snoozed" it. It rang it's highly-annoying "bee-bee-beep, bee-bee-beep" every 10 minutes during the half hour I was down the hall in the bathroom getting ready to leave (and NOBODY could figure out how to turn the darned thing off!). So much for trying to be quiet and keep from bothering anyone! My mom & sister are VERY patient women! Myself, I have zero sense of humor at 5 a.m. At any rate, Ron, Kristina, A.J. and I left Dick's house just after 5:30 a.m. and arrived at their house in Vancouver at 5:15 Sunday evening. The weather was beautiful and we made excellent time, even with several potty breaks along the way and meal stops in Redding and Grants Pass.



I've talked to my sis nearly every day since I left, and she tells me Dick is about the same, but has become very discouraged and seems to be losing hope. Although they seem to be carrying on the daily routine quite well without me, I know they'll be glad to have me back. I don't feel like I do a whole lot there, but my sis and I are joined at the hip - we function better in these situations when we're together, and we much prefer it that way!

Till next time...
XOXO



MY TEXT FOR TODAY: Matthew 6:33-34

LIVING BIBLE: Your heavenly father already knows [what you need]. So don't be anxious about tomorrow. God will take care of your tomorrow, too. Live one day at a time!

NIV: But strive first for the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring worries of its own. Today's trouble is enough for today.